How Can i Not Love You

~ How Can I Not Love You ~
Cannot touch, Cannot hold, Cannot be together
Cannot love, Cannot kiss, Cannot love eachother
Must be strong and we must let go
Cannot say what our hearts must know

How can I not love you
What do I tell my heart
When do I not want you here in my arms
How does one walks away
From all of the memories
How do I not miss you when you are gone

Cannot trip, Cannot share sweet and tender moments
Cannot feel how we feel, Must pretend it's over
Must be brave and we must go on, Must not say
Wat we no longer long

How can I not love you
What do I tell my heart
When do I not want you here in my arms
How does one walks away
From all of the memories
How do I not miss you when you are gone

How can I not love you

Must be brave and we must be strong
Cannot say what we no longer long

How can I not love you
What do I tell my heart
When do I not want you here in my arms
How does one walks away
From all of the memories
How do I not miss you when you are gone

How can I not love you
When you are gone

friday..

Thought i should blog first before starting on my mad rush for my attachment report..Yeah its a friday nite and here i am slogging (going to) away..Price to pay for being lazy and procrastinating!! And poor me is sick :( Developed a really bad cough recently..my throat is so itchy!! *coughz*
I must say i have been quite a gd gal lately cos i have been going home for dinners! Cant resist all the yummy soups i have missed in my stay in Aust...yumz*

I noticed ever since i came back, i had been such a lazy gal..god knows how am i going to complete the 3 assignments i will have for my paediatrics nutrition subject next boy..
Talking abt uni work, i passed the subject i dreaded the most! hiakz..i am soo relieved! Next 2 hurdles will be to pass this attachment as well as the paeds i mentioned earlier..

Then dearie and i were thinking of going to either HK or taiwan for a break after my attachment..Hmm..dearie wanted to go to some resort but mum expressed her worries about us going ( she claims shes paranoid after all the bombing and tsunamis)..Oh well..will see how it goes when dearie comes back..Dear is in Thailand now..Hope he is having fun!

Think i will go to the temple tmr in the morning and also get a bday gift..alritey..gotta start on my work now! Blog again..buaiz..

sick..

Didnt go to work today..had diarrhoea..couldnt figure out which food caused it man..2 more weeks left to rush my work liaoz..and i have got to be disciplined!! No going out after work...must stay home durin wkends too liaoz..sighz..sianz...

I am finally going to attend a friend's wedding dinner! Just got the invitation card from her...Shes actually my ex colleague from the last temp job i had..she and her husband are just so loving..really envious man.. Met up wif her, mabel and jiahui and had such a gd time just sharing stories about rships to match the theme of the night! *LOVE, RSHIPS and MARRIAGE*

I am not ashamed to say i m resistant to change..however, if given some time and to something that cannot be helped, i would conform to the change..
I have been unhappy..needless to say, the stress from the attachment exacerbates the misery..I am so tired of being unhappy..and i guess all of my readers are sick of reading it too..I wished i could just draw myself away from the gaping hole...

Life upon returning back here wasnt how i thought it would be..Over there, i was always hoping to be back in your arms again..cos i missed you so much and i knew u missed me heaps too..though we suffered from the absence of seeing each other..the sweetness exuding from our phone calls were just so nice..the naive me expected you to able to spend as much time as you could wif me..

Back here..no doubt we had our sweet times together..but i guessed we have just changed..your career unarguably is the priority for you now..and i wasnt prepared...wasnt prepared to have to learn to tolerate the lesser time you will have for me, to have to accept that you do certain things to try to help in your job...to have to accept the busy you not have the time and patience to give little surprises or just hug and hold mi lovingly and tell me things are gonna be ok even though u may deem as impractical...The rship has ventured into another stage..a stage which is unfamiliar to me..a stage which sometimes upsets and confuses me...a stage which u always say i will understand when i start to work..Does one's perspective of the relationship really change after working?

I m confused..and i dont wan to grow up...i am beginning to think of myself as childish, as not being understanding enough..am i really that? I know im too sensitive and pessimistic for my own good..if only i could get to choose my character huh? As if i could help it...To help myself? Well..what is there to reassure myself that everything is ok? I really dont know..and i need guidance...

Lost Jo..

Blue blue monday..

Must be the withdrawal from the heaps of fun i had last wkend that i felt extremely blue today..what with one of the report barely done and the other which seems impossible to complete..Jo is feeling really blue, stressed and depressed...Sighz..how am i ever going to pass..
I have got oni 3 weeks to complete them!!

On a lighter note, i have to tell u all abt the celebration we had at MW for Ms Paul paul's bday..It was good..and i m glad the bday gal enjoyed herself..apart from a couple of unhappy and unforseen events that happened..Hope yan fang is feeling alrite now..

Was somewhat reluntantly whisked off to tanjong pagar...then again, after some valid explanation..it didnt seem that unreasonable afterall...stayed for awhile and off we went to the 24 hr coffeeshop to feed our growling stomachs..

Sunday morning, we had yummy popiah and it was more interesting than the ones we were used to as we had to roll them ourselves..There was this shop which catered all the ingredients from the skins to the chopped peanuts..Even jeff who is not a great fan of popiah liked it!
Caught Fab 4 in the evening and i think it must be the lack of sleep from sat nite..i almost dozed off at the beginning of the show! Luckily i managed to keep awake after the pace of the show became faster..AFter the show, jeff actually suggested going to my fav coffee joint !! hehe..Coffee club express at somerset! Yeah..see lah..how to expect me to return to plain, stressful and boring work after i had so much fun in the past 2 days boy..

Torture..

Your #1 Match: ENFP

The Inspirer You love being around people, and you are deeply committed to your friends. You are also unconventional, irreverant, and unimpressed by authority and rules. Incredibly perceptive, you can usually sense if someone has hidden motives. You use lots of colorful language and expressions. You're qutie the storyteller! You would make an excellent entrepreneur, politician, or journalist.

Your #2 Match: ESFP

The Performer You are a natural performer and happiest when you're entertaining others. A great friend, you are generous, fun-loving and optimistic. You love to laugh - and you like almost all people equally. You accept life as it is, and you do your best to make each day fantastic. You would make a good actor, designer, or counselor.

Your #3 Match: ENFJ

The Giver You strive to maintain harmony in relationships, and usually succeed. Articulate and enthusiastic, you are good at making personal connections. Sometimes you idealize relationships too much - and end up being let down. You find the most energy and comfort in social situations ... where you shine. You would make a good writer, human resources director, or psychologist.

What's Your Personality Type?

Early morning..disillusioned...

Hi pple..am chomping away on my cereal and milk while typing this..Thought i should blog before getting changed for work..Let mi see..Met up with some of my Uni friends for a get together at 'Ting Yuan Ma La Steamboat'..It was priced at $16.80 per person..sth like all u can eat buffet..however this time, you dont even need to move an inch to get the food you want..cos the waiter will bring it to you..We tried 3 kinds of soup and the spiciness of the Ma La wasnt that hard to handle..Im not bragging here lah..not saying that i can handle really spicy food but i didnt hear any of my friends complain that it was too hot..But only when you drink the soup will you then realise its quite spicy huh..
Then Kristy suggested going for KTV..and off we went ( some of us) to Kbox Suntec..Knowing me, I am always onz for some singing! Sang and joked till 1 am and i decided to take my leave though i really would love to stay on..Had to wake up early to WORK mah! *sianz* And did i mention i am quite dead cos i havnt even done like half of my report which is gonna be due end of this mth and to be submitted to a very strict lecturer? *sighz*
Yup..alrite i gotta go decide what i have to wear from my somewhat drab and boring wardrobe for work..

Will blog again..

a month has passed..

Wow..its one of those rare saturdays where i find myself at home..Finally got the chance to sleep in, but i think i need a new pillow..the old and flat one has been causing all the annoying headaches and neckaches!! i need to get a full length mirror too!! Seems like its time to head down to ikea! See if jeff is free tmr to acc mi or not..

Was out with Mich and pauline last nite..and coincidentally, we were all decked in pink and denim bottoms! hiakz..we make a pretty pic but too bad the oni digital cam died..so no pics to show how pink we were! Hee

Another more mth to go for my attachment, hope everything goes well and just let mi pass pls!! Now i finally understand why ah eng was actually afraid of graduating..i feel lost..What am i going to do after i graduate?
1. Work as a dietitian?
2. Go try for the travel industry?
Sighz..choose 1, will i like my job? i mean i am feeling sick of it..like when i was having my attachment, i dont detest it though i was constantly grilled by my supervisor cos i know it will be different if i was already a dietitian..But will i like my job for long? Guess no one knows..only if i start working in it..Seriously, i dont look forward to working in this line at all..i wonder if its burn out or issit that my interest has faded?

Choose 2, firstly, i have to be able to get in..and i have had enough of friends and family reacting like this : 'You are going to waste your degree', 'No job prospects', 'What are you going to do after this?'

Well, all above meant well..but its my life rite? This is what i want to do at this point of life..If there are so many ' what if'..why dont we just come up with a 'fool proof' plan in our life..have everything planned out so that we can counter every 'what if'? Will we really be happy then?